As dumb as it may sound, I didn't know what a trans person was back when I was 15. I felt different from the boys. I didn't like how they behaved, I didn't play as intensely as they did, I preferred spending time with the girls.
Most notably, I felt that discrepancy between my sex, birth certificate, and term of address people used for me—all of which I thought were hard-coded—and what I truly felt I was.
Years back I had tried cross-dressing, and when lunch break was over at school, I lined up with the girls—instead of with the boys—to go to our next class.
Despite all that, I was unable to put my finger on what I was feeling.
It wasn't until I was watching a video about the making of “Attack of the Petscii Robots,” an 8-bit video game, that I finally had an answer.
A familiar-looking person started presenting the creation process for the soundtrack. I started wondering where I had seen her before. When I remembered a past video she featured in, something just clicked. She was now presenting as a woman!
I recall saying aloud, “Is that possible?” I mean, I was never taught about gender identity anywhere. I didn't think that what I felt and ways to correct it were valid, but there she was, wearing feminine clothes and with a soother voice. I just felt identified with her.
I stayed up late researching trans people, gender dysphoria, gender-affirming care, and name change. It was exciting to discover that there was an explanation for my feelings and that I could be the person that I am meant to be.
(Adapted from an essay by Naoko from 2022. Post date changed for chronology.)
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